yes, it's me ;)

I wanted to stop for a few minutes and say hello to my lovely friends ;)

I have been a bit absent from my normal blogging days for a few weeks now, and I know you all have noticed, I can tell by the lovely and supporting comments and e-mails ;)

Well the thing is, I know that many remember of my grandfather passing away, it had a very big impact on me.  Though I tried to hide the effects, like I always do, it didn't work.  I have just been in such a depressed state lately. 

Adding to that issue, my other grandfather has been doing poorly as time goes on, his health and organs seem to just go downhill.  Seeing my Mom trying to cope with that is just so hard.  She was born on his birthday, she was my grandfather's birthday present.  They have a very close bond, and it's just eating her up.  I could even say that i have seen her age years in the last couple of months :(

On top of that, my stepfather was admitted into the hospital a few weeks ago, he was diagnosed with emphysema and two days later with Congestive Heart Failure.  My mom dealt with my Father's passing 30 years ago, but to think that her husband and Father are getting so close to it, scares her and me so much.  I am not sure how she would be able to deal with all of that. 

Yeah, I can see while I type that it's no wonder that I have been so stressed and depressed lately, it's been rough around here.

I know it seems that it should stop here, lol, but it doesn't.  Things just never seem to stop or slow down around us. 

Izeah's behavioral issues have gotten severely worst.  I get calls from his after school program daily, and once he gets home things just don't seem to change much.  I am just overwhelmed with the complaints, and just basically the lack of options for my baby.

But why stop there?!??!? lol
I know that everyone knows we are a Military Family ;) , what some may not know is that we are a ONE income Family at that :/
We moved out of Military housing a year ago, and have been renting in the civilian world, yes I love the peace about being out of the "area"; but our rent and utilities are over $400 more than the alloted rent amount that we receive.  We are definitely living beyond our means here.  Every month is a battle to try to stretch the last dollars until payday, we fail MANY times. 

Being that I have been receiving blows from every direction, there was one missing right?
Something in our house going wrong, because let's face it, SOMETHING ALWAYS has to happen at our Mansion, lol.  On Friday April 30, the morning of our 11th Wedding Anniversary, our washing machine woke up dead lol.  Hubby took it apart and we tried to do everything every web page suggested, but there was no resurrecting it, RIP washer.  We have absolutely no money to buy a new one or used one, or even to go to the laundromat, just TRY TO IMAGINE such a large Family with no washing machine!!!!  It's full blown chaos!!!  I just about have gone bonkers thinking of what we could do to find another washer. 

Why not end it with something stinky?
On Saturday morning, hubby noticed a strong skunk smell, so we went to the backyard to check it out.  On the far end of the yard, there was a lifeless skunk.  We found a hole that looked brand new, and the skunk was a couple of feet from it.  We figured that our dog caught it as soon as it entered our yard.  Unfortunately we found out that our dog was sprayed a little too late :/  The dog tried to go pick up the skunk once he saw us, so hubby took him into the garage while we took care of the skunk.  When we went in the house to bring the dog back out, Goodness!!!!!!!!!! The entire house, garage and dog stunk!!!!  It's been 3 days, and all the blankets in the garage stink and we have no washer!!!!




Yes, that all has happened in the last couple of weeks, and I am so ready for things to stop.
It has been a downhill roller coaster and it just isn't fun anymore :/


On another note...
I know a lot of people that have stopped blogging about their personal lives because of the lack of "professionalism" when it comes to the representation of brands or companies.  I thought about that for a while, if it's the right thing to do.  Going through all these problems also made me think twice about blogging about them because I was afraid of what companies would think about my "professionalism".  After all of the thinking ;), I decided that I can't stop. 
I can't stop being me, it's why I started this blog in the first place, for the love of writing and sharing.  I love to tell the world about our daily adventures and our amazing ones as well ;)  I see that I had lost sight of myself for a while with all of these problems going on in our lives, but it's now more than ever; that I should blog about our lives right?  The overwhelming stress has brought me to the state I am in now, migraines, insomnia, loss of appetite, and depression.  Today, I am making a promise to myself that I am not going to let the 1,000,000 problems keep me from my love of blogging ;)

Well I apologize for the ranting, lol, I just wanted to make sure I let me friends know why I have been so absent.  Thank you so much for the love and support from everyone.  I hope to soon be able to share some GOOD news, if and whenever they decide to visit me, lol. 

HUGS!!!!

8 comments:

  1. http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/05/03/jingles-may-awards-week-1-awards-4-u-all/

    Have A Happy May!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lily:

    Sorry for the lose to one of your grandfathers, best wishes for your other grandfather and your stepfather...prayers for your kid's behavior issues...

    I wish you have shared these as soon as it is out, in that way, you get feedback instantly and you would NOT have to suffer or be in depression for so long...

    God Bless,
    Never feel sorry to share sad news.
    Be yourself.
    Love to see you back!

    ReplyDelete
  3. http://itistimetothinkformyself.blogspot.com/2010/05/jingles-may-followers-award.html

    i opened as blogger account,
    awards there,
    total three post for awards,
    feel free to take what you want.
    Missed you!
    Smiles!

    ReplyDelete
  4. So sorry for you losses, it is tough to lose loved ones. Glad you are back to posting, know the financial struggles too well.
    kim

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi,
    Tag Your it!
    WOW is all I can say. You are very strong and I think it is wonderful you write about life in your blog.
    Thoughts are with you
    LizAnn
    www.forgirlsanddolls.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi,
    Tag Your it!
    WOW is all I can say. You are very strong and I think it is wonderful you write about life in your blog.
    Thoughts are with you
    LizAnn
    www.forgirlsanddolls.com

    ReplyDelete
  7. Much hugs and love to you. Better late than never, right?

    ReplyDelete
  8. モテる度チェッカーが今回リニューアルしました!!今迄と違い診断内容にモテない人と診断された方を救済する、速攻効果が出るモテる為のアドバイスが付きます、またモテる診断された人には、より一層のモテ・テクニックを手に入れませんか

    ReplyDelete

Thank you very much for stopping by and even more for leaving a comment ;) Have a great month!!!